“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they?” (Matthew 6:25-26 NASB)
In April 2015 I was in a car accident that changed my life forever. The accident not only reversed the shoulder surgery I had three months prior but also caused me to have severe pain/nerve issues in my back and arms. At this time no one had diagnosed my pain/nerve issues and had associated pain issues with my shoulder only. I had to have a second shoulder surgery towards the end of the year to fix the damaged from the accident. During that surgery, my heart stopped due to a heart defect. Which led to open heart surgery towards the end of 2016.
One month after my open heart surgery I decided to go back to work against the doctor’s order thinking it will get my mind off the fact that my body is failing me. I continued to work trying to overcome the pain/health issues plaguing me because I am a man and I need to provide for my family no matter what. Once I started to realize that I can’t do what I use to I turned to alcohol to deal with my issues which got out of control fast. At the time I was 30, in pain constantly with no
answer as to why, hooked on alcohol, and taking my frustrations out on my family. In March of 2017 it hit me that I can’t work anymore plus my wife told me she is leaving with the kids. So one day I decided that the best I can do for my family is leaving. So I tried to commit suicide.
In my weakness God saved me. I didn’t know Jesus yet but I knew something was missing from my life and I began searching for what that was. All the hurt and fear I was holding onto God took away. Once I understood that God is sovereign and stopped fighting His plan for me, everything started to fall into place. God has a plan for all of us. It’s up to us to have faith in God’s sovereign plan for our lives. Today my family is still here and stronger than ever, no alcohol in years, and even though my body is still broken I have joy that only comes from God.
Thank you God for saving me and guiding me to the path on which I should go. Please continue to guide my steps to overcome my need to be in control. To keep my eyes focused on You and Your plan for my life. Let Your sovereign plan be glorified through my life and testimony. I ask this is Jesus name. Amen.